WORK PLACE MOM
”…” //
”What’s up?” //
”I’ve just totally run out of energy.” //
”Do you need chocolate?” ”Well, actually…” //
”…right now I’d need someone to firmly but gently tell me to go home.” //
”Kati. Go home.” //
”Yes.” //
”Would you like that chocolate, too?” ”Yes <3"
THREE DAYS WITH ONE STONE
”Hey. What day is it?” ”Well, that depends. For ME, it is Thursday, Friday AND Saturday.” //
”Huh? How is that in any way possible?” //
”Well, if we look at a proper calendar, it is Saturday.” //
”But I’ve got six days of work without days off, and it’s day five now, so it’s Friday.” //
”However, I’ve got one more day before I’ve got a day off, so in that sense it’s Thursday.” //
”You are so weird.” ”Irregular work times make people weird.”
DISAPPOINTMENT
”…another car parked so that it took two parking slots! Like — it can’t be that difficult to park properly, can it?” //
”How come people can’t even park anymore?” ”I really don’t know.” //
”I am disappointed.” ”Well excuse me for being stupid.” //
”You are not stupid, just a disappointment.” //
… //
”That was a good one, I’ll be using that, too!” ”From now on I’ll introduce myself with, ’Hi, I’m Violet, I’m a disappointment.’!”
On tilanteita, jolloin en osaa pitää suutani kiinni. Onneksi niissä tilanteissa, kun ihmiset oikeasti loukkantuisivat, yleensä pysyn hiljaa. Tämä ”pettymys” nauroi noin vartin putkeen.
There are times when I just can’t stay quiet. Luckily I can usually keep my mouth shut when people would actually be hurt. This ’disappointment’ laughed for about 15 minutes at this.
CHICKENS
”Those chickens! Please remind me that I need to ink those chickens!” //
”Heh, my first thought was you going in to the hen house and — ” //
”Cluuuuuuuccckkk!!!” ”!” //
”Nooo, that would be animal torture!” ”Or…” //
”You could go to the restaurant and ask them for a chicken.” //
”Yes… you can do what you please with a dead broiler.” //
”Now I really need to ask: what are you three talking about?” ”Why, well, coloring pictures. Coloring pictures for Easter…”
GUIDE QUALITIES
”Hello, we had booked a guided tour for our preschool group. I think we’re a bit early, though.” ”Welcome!” //
”Your guide Annie will be here in just a minute. You can wait here at the playground.” ”All right, thank you.” //
”Who’s Annie?” ”Annie is a guide, she’s going to give you the tour.” //
”Is this Annie pretty?” ”What? Well, yeah. Why?” //
”OK.” ”?”
MY TASTE IN MUSIC
”We’d still need some energy conservation tips for this quiz.” ”There are some here already.” ”This water question still lacks one.” //
”Hmm, yes, something about saving water.” ”Along the lines of, ’take a shorter shower’?” //
”Or in a more positive way… ’Limit your shower to be as long as your favorite piece of music’?” //
”Well. My favorite piece of music is Bach’s St Matthew Passion. It’s three and a half hours.”
Liikun pyörällä ja julkisilla, vältän lentämistä ja uusien asioiden turhaa ostamista ja olen kasvissyöjä, mutta ai että tykkään lämpimistä suihkuista.
I move around by bike and public transport, avoid flying and buying unnecessary stuff and am vegetarian, but I really like hot showers.
A CALL FOR HELP
”…and when you click there you’ll find the customer groups. Yes, there. That’s it.” //
”If the group isn’t in the system just scream at the top of your lungs and I’ll come to help you.” ”Okay!” //
…
The group is not in the system – OK //
”AAAAAAHHHH!!!”
WORK MATE BIRDS
Olin kevään opettajana ammattikoulussa. Lähtiessäni piirsin työkaverini lintuina.
In the spring I worked as a teacher in a vocational school. When I left, I drew my work mates as birds.
Kortin sisälle piirsin itseni selittämään asioita, ja olin tietenkin varis:
I drew myself inside the card explaining things, and naturally I was a crow:
Opiskelijat olivat tällä kertaa kaikki liroja.
All the students were wood sandpipers this time.
LOVE-HATE RELATIONSHIP
Olin töissä ammattikoulussa puoli vuotta. Se oli enimmäkseen aika kivaa, mutta sitten oli näitä koulutuksia…
I worked in a vocational school for six months. It was mostly pretty much fun but then there were training days…
”That’s a herring gull, right?” ”Yes, that’s correct!” //
”I’d also like to welcome you to this remote training.” ”There are quite a few of you, 186 altogether.” ”…” //
”Here, have a garlic mustard chip!” ”Yummy!” //
”…when comparing to the last three years…” //
”Well, now it’s burning, good job!” ”Yes!” //
”…mirroring the values of the learning institute…” ”Z” //
”Just a little longer, you can do this!” //
”…KrOps and SePo teams and the Alisa software…” ”!!!” //
”~~~~~!” ”~~~~~!” //
”…charting the customer profile…” ”Grrrggh.”
FULL BODY JOB
”Birds can be identified from other things than colors and patters, too.” //
”Such as from sounds. A wood pigeon sounds something like this… wro-huu-hu-hu-huu!” ”That sounds really authentic!” //
”Woodpeckers have an easy-to-recognize flying style: flapflapflap – sliiiiide – flapflapflap – sliiiiide…” //
”Starlings mostly walk… whereas blackbirds jump, like this. A little bit quieter, though.” //
”Herons have a fun way of walking. Kinda careful and noble.” //
”A white-tailed eagle soars like a barn door tossed to the sky…” //
”…circling slowly without moving its wings… disappearing into the azure… like so…”